Clinton, South Carolina, Sunday, February 15, 2015, 2:18 p.m.
Bizarro World is back. Famous people did not say the following:
Just when they thought it was safe enough to go back [near] the water …
I belong to no organized sport. I follow NASCAR.
Never has so much metal been wasted by so many for so few.
For many years, I have judged innovations on the basis of child’s logic. If something cannot be explained in terms a child can understand, it has been infected by the corruption and jaded logic of adulthood.
Kid: “Hey, Dad, why do we have to have weapons that can blow up the world eighteen times.”
Dad: “So that we’ll never have to use them.”
In attempting to make some sense of how NASCAR determines the front row of the Daytona 500, after considerable trial and error, I found comfort in the words of Lewis Carroll in Alice in Wonderland.
“But I don’t want to go among mad people,” Alice remarked.
“Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat, “or you wouldn’t have come here.”
“Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?”
“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.”
“I don’t much care where.”
“Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.”
In fact, Alice in Wonderland is to the NASCAR rulebook what the Book of Mormon is to the Bible.
“You used to be much more … ‘muchier.’ You’ve lost your muchness.”
“Have I gone mad?”
“I’m afraid so, but let me tell you something. The best people usually are.”
And, finally, the philosophical basis of the qualifying plan:
“You would have to be half mad to dream me up.”
It was interesting, in case it takes that for you to be interested.
Read my books. You need some relief. http://www.amazon.com/Monte-Dutton/e/B005H3B144/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1416767492&sr=8-1