Loretta Lynn, that great voice of working-class values, released a song in 1971 called “One’s on the Way”:
They say to have her hair done, Liz flies all the way to France / And Jackie’s seen in a discotheque, doing a brand-new dance / And the White House social season should be glittering and gay / But here in Topeka the rain is a-fallin’ / The faucet is a-drippin’ and the kids are a-bawlin’ / One of ‘em’s a-toddling and one is a-crawlin’ / And one’s on the way
“One’s on the Way” is a humorous commentary on the inability of working-class people to relate to the lives of the beautiful people. Lynn satirically compared the housewife’s plight to that of Elizabeth Taylor, Jackie Onassis and, in the latter verse, Raquel Welch and Debbie Reynolds.
It’s 24 days until the Daytona 500. Here’s what’s going on in NASCAR. Danica Patrick is getting divorced. She is dating the Nationwide champion, Ricky Stenhouse Jr. (naturally, a “Nationwide” champion “gets around”). Banned driver Jeremy Mayfield contacted NASCAR’s CEO, Brian France, about regaining his eligibility. He did this via a call-in radio show. The fan base is presently recovering from speculation on who was and who wasn’t on P. Diddy’s yacht and whether or not Jeff Gordon and Clint Bowyer settled their simmering feud amidst the revelry there.
Based on speculation, the Daytona 500 is as likely to be decided by romance as horsepower, which, of course, is ridiculous.
Of course, there is other news: a director of competition here, a limited sponsorship there. Starting times have been announced! Racing Electronics is in; Track Scan is out (at ISC tracks).
Not too long ago, the model for “NASCAR on Fox” was “NFL on Fox.” Now it’s “Entertainment Tonight.” Why isn’t Dr. Phil in the booth, or, maybe, on pit road counseling Danica and Ricky?
They’ve distanced themselves from us, just like, come to think of it, everybody else who’s rich, famous and upwardly mobile. It’s probably an inevitable consequence of success. Racing has gotten bigger, and we, well, we’re still the same, struggling to make our house payments and wondering if the next check is in the mail.
Meanwhile, here in Topeka (or Clinton, as the case may be) …